Topic: Die Hard In A Die Hard

Die Hard fans of the original Die hard movie decided to murder Bruce Willis to keep him from making another Die Hard, to that end they take Emma Heming hostage and trap Willis on the set of Die Hard 19, Die Hardest.

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One Time @ Bland Camp...

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Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

I'd like to be all Mr. Admin over here and say "hey, that's not in the spirit of this board!"

...but, I think that could be this decade's Galaxy Quest, because that's really funny. So I challenge the following comments to plot out acts one through three, and fill it with awesome Die Hard jokes. Let's do this.

Teague Chrystie

I have a tendency to fix your typos.

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Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

Well, obviously Act 1 is pretty much the same. Starts with Bruce on an airplane, headed to the wrap party for DIE HARDEST in LA. He gets there, argues with his wife, and then the fans attack. And because it's a Galaxy Quest thing, they've meticulously created a situation that exactly mirrors the plot of the original Die Hard. Bruce gets isolated right off the bat.

"The Doctor is Submarining through our brains." --Teague

Twitter | Tumblr, for links to all my writing.

Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

Yep, the key to making it work is keeping Bruce as the protagonist and the insane fans as the bad guys. We learn early on that Bruce is just doing these sequels for the money and hates them creatively, but maybe add a bunch of ex-wives he has to make payments to to help justify why he's doing these movies and keep him sympathetic. I think JCVD is a really good template for how you would do this movie (in that case Jean Claude is doing movies he hates so he can fund his divorce lawyer to try to keep custody of his daughter): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4z_6UfkQ-c0

Along the lines of Doc Subs point, the fans would intentionally dress up as the various different henchmen from die hard to mimic the scenario, so you'd have the german brothers, the token asian dude, and their lead doing an Alan Rickman imitation. They let Bruce escape initially to follow the setup of the movie, but their plan is to kill off the fiction of Die Hard once and for all by forcing the ending to play out different, namely Bruce failing and getting killed, aka Dieing Hardest.

Of course Bruce the actor ends up being more resourceful than they predicted, hence Act 2.

Last edited by bullet3 (2013-07-29 07:38:52)

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Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

Of course they can't announce their intentions they have to pretend to be terrorists atleast for a little bit  big_smile

Extended Edition - 130 'Doctor Who Series 10'
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Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

BRUCE (tied to chair)
You're just fans? Not actually terrorists?

LEADER (smiling)
Who said we were terrorists?

BRUCE
STOP QUOTING THE MOVIE!

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries

Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

I think we should also kidnap Alan Rickman and force them to do scenes together--

I MEAN THE PEOLPE IN THE MOVEIE SHULD DO THAT NOT REAL PEOPLE NNAMED US

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries

Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

Zarban wrote:

BRUCE (tied to chair)
You're just fans? Not actually terrorists?

LEADER (smiling)
Who said we were terrorists?

BRUCE
STOP QUOTING THE MOVIE!

Second Draft:

BRUCE (tied to chair)
You're just fans? Not actually terrorists?

LEADER (smiling)
Who said we were terrorists?
(beat)
Right? 

BRUCE
I... what?

LEADER
Come on, that's from the movie
That's like the line from the movie!

BRUCE
Got any idea how many movies I've done, kid? 

LEADER
Oh. 

BRUCE
Can I have a cigarette?

The Leader leans in to give Bruce a cigarette.  Bruce HEAD BUTTS HIM.

Bruce leaps to his feet - he's long since untied himself - and takes the unconscious Leader's gun.

He checks the clip - full.  Kicks off his shoes. 

BRUCE
Yippee ki-yay, motherfucker.

He disappears into the stairwell.

INT. CONTROL ROOM - THAT SAME MOMENT

ALAN RICKMAN and a HENCHMAN are watching all this on a series of monitors.

ALAN RICKMAN
Regular as clockwork.

Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

I could see Kevin Smith as the big bad. Doing it to punish Bruce for how he acted on Cop Out.

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Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

Later on the elevator opens with a badly beaten up guy...written on his chest

"now i have the screenplay.

ho-ho-ho"

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Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

hmmm, this has taken off since I last looked. Web series?

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One Time @ Bland Camp...

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Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

Well if you think Willis would be up for a web  series?

Extended Edition - 130 'Doctor Who Series 10'
VFX Reel | Twitter | IMDB | Blog

Re: Die Hard In A Die Hard

He won't be, but we'll play it like Chubby Rain.

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One Time @ Bland Camp...

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