I don't see what there IS to like about this movie.

Nobody in the movie has an original character nor are any inspired performances turned in.  We have the brooding soldier torn between his ethics and his orders.  We have the proud native princess who doesn't know if she can trust the beautiful white boy she has her heart on.  We have the spicy latina soldier who cracks wise and don' take no shit from nobody, mmm mm.  We have the stern, manifest destiny touting Colonel trying to out Ermey Ermey.

Sigourney was the only performance in that movie that I enjoyed, and I can't even tell you what purpose she served to the plot in her 10 minutes of screen time.  She smoked, then she died.  I guess that's usually the sequence of events, but damn.

So if the characters are already stale by the time the movie starts, then what do we have left?  The plot?  It is LITERALLY Dances With Pocahontas In Fern Gully: Revolutions.  The visuals?  Well I actually saw Fern Gully as a kid and have seen Zangarmarsh in WoW, and between those two you've got Pandora.  I didn't see it in 3D- but I did see Friday the 13th part 3 in 3D and it didn't enhance much for me. 

What else might save it?  Well, I suppose as long as there weren't any jarring wtf moments and the message itself didn't piss me off, I could give this movie a pass.  Oh wait.  Listen, when we said the native americans had a special connection with nature, WE DIDN'T MEAN THEIR HAIR WAS A FUCKING USB WAND.  That doesn't make sense, and it's a level of preachy douchebaggery that I literally haven't seen before.  Speaking of preachy, I'm really tired of white guilt movies.  I haven't ever enslaved or conquered anyone, so I'm kinda past feeling bad about what my long dead genetic predecessors might have done.  But what REALLY gets me is this: towards the end of the movie, they've set up that Pandora isn't going to save them and that it's up to them to fight off the invasion.  Pandora, of course, being God for all intents and purposes.  Then they start losing the fight and "God" sends aaalll the animals and shit to swing the fight in their favor.

So the message here is this: don't murder the indians and blow up their holy land to get to their oil, or else God will smite you.  Oh, and trees and shit.

Fuck Avatar.  Jim Cameron waited 15 years to make this, and then the public actually ate it up.  I shudder at what he'll do next.  And this is coming from a guy who puts Titanic in his top 3.

That double raid sounds awesome.  No way could we drum up 80 players and coordinate them on my server.  Allies outnumber Horde side like, 3 to 1 on Farstriders.

I got my For The Horde achieve recently though.  It's really a lot of fun- doubly so since I've never played an ally toon past 13 or so, so I was seeing these cities for the first time while repainting them with corpses.

Jeez, man.  Alliance?  REEEEALLY?

I'm trying to get into raiding and shit but it's one of those "you have to be geared to be in the club and you have to be in the club to get geared" kinda societies on my server.

Cool stuff though, man.

So, I've only seen Avatar once in theaters, and I immediately recognized the entire story as being Dances With Blue Wolves, so that didn't impress me.  I didn't see it in 3D, which people tell me is the important part, but I actually saw it high as BALLS and was entirely "meh" about the visuals.  So I kinda feel like even in 3D I'd be entirely underwhelmed by this thing- but I look forward to DIF corroborating that for me.

[19:12] XKingofShadowsX: I'm half considering doing it now, though.  The movie starts with Ken Mattingly coming through a black hole into the past, changing the timeline and causing the mission to go just fine at thanksgiving... at the cost of his own sanity.  Leading to the infamous christmas dinner mission that ended in gore and death.
[19:13] XKingofShadowsX: Done Eddie Murphy style, with me in various haircuts, accents, and hats.  Would you be willing to animate a talking Kyle-dog to play a wisecracking member of mission control?  It's okay, the timeline's messed up.
[19:14] i eat your emo: kyle dog?
[19:14] XKingofShadowsX: Yes.
[19:14] i eat your emo: what?
[19:14] XKingofShadowsX: Me, as a dog.
[19:15] XKingofShadowsX: Talking dog.
[19:15] XKingofShadowsX: That looks like me.
[19:15] XKingofShadowsX: And cracks wise.
[19:15] XKingofShadowsX: References TMZ.
[19:15] i eat your emo: ...no, but I'd watch that movie.
[19:23] XKingofShadowsX: Sigh.  Gonna have to put peanut butter in a stolen dog's mouth now.
[19:23] XKingofShadowsX: I'm gonna make that movie.  Would it sincerely piss Brian off?  because thinking about it is kinda making me giggle.
[19:24] i eat your emo: no, he'd love it/
[19:25] XKingofShadowsX: Right on.
[19:25] XKingofShadowsX: *writes*

I saw Thanksgiving before I knew Teague knew the guy who made it.  I was thinking sequel.

Or reboot, I suppose.

I'd love to hear your take on any of the Pegg/Frost/Wright work, just for the record.

I don't see how where the ship is built effects the quality of the movie.  Also, relax, because I don't think there is a relationship between which side of this debate someone is on and in how good of shape they are.  You did boot camp, I'm barely in good enough shape to pretend to fight for 10 minutes.

Don't get defensive on me, sir.  I would never bash you for being a nerd- Teague and I were best friends in high school, and that was BEFORE Teague lost weight, died his hair, and started getting laid.  In fact, the only girl Fig could get in his nerdiest era is the girl I'm proooobably going to wind up marrying.  C'mon.  I'm not bashing you for being a nerd.

My point is that I SEE all your nitpicks but I don't see why you say this movie makes no sense when using the same microscope you're looking at this one, I can't think of ANY movies that make sense.  I understand you want a perfect Star Wars movie- I fucking love Superman and half of DIF thinks Superman is a dumb character and a dumb story because of the sub-par movies that have been made about him.  You give me some money and I'll make a Superman movie that will make any human being with a soul cry.  But if someone makes a Superman movie that is as true to the spirit of Superman as JJ's Trek is true to the spirit of Trek, with as much passion and emotion as JJ's Trek has, I would dance naked in the streets out of happiness. 

I guess my point is that yes- dumb things happen in Trek 09, but it captures Kirk and Spock and Bones, looks incredible, and your main nitpicks about the mechanations of the narrative could be equally applied to nearly every version of Star Trek that has ever existed.

I should point out that on no level am I feeling any hostility for anyone here that disagrees.  I take it we're all seasoned forumers here and I know that sometimes shit gets heated for no reason because tone is hard to read through the internet.  I don't intend to get into a Dark City fight with any of you, because at the end of the day I've listened to more hours of you guys sharing your opinions than I've listened to MUSIC in the last year, so there's no lack of respect intended here.

No, no.  There is a MASSIVE difference between saying "it's a movie" and "it's JUST a movie."

The difference being this: if I say it's just a movie so who gives a shit, then you're right- that's straight rere talk.  My point is that it's a movie, so let's tell a story worth telling.

I have absolutely zero desire to see the realistic Star Trek movie where Kirk sits with his thumb up his ass at the Academy, periodically jerking off, while everyone else rushes off and is brutally murdered as soon as they come out of warp.  Because that is how that movie ends if Bones isn't a good enough friend to James (a key character point) to do something shady to get him on the ship.  And I have no desire to see the movie where Kirk sits in sick bay and enjoys the ride along, hiding from Spock the whole time and giggling about how he's in space- because that's the movie we get if he doesn't break every single rule imaginable to get command of the ship and blow up some green blooded rapscallions.

It's a movie- so give me the characters I love doing the things that make them awesome.

I absolutely disagree that the fact that Luke gets an X-Wing is a weakness in Star Wars.  It makes the movie.  He comes into his own.  It doesn't make real life sense, no- but real life sucks and heroes usually die before anyone learns their name.  Once again, it's a movie- I don't want to see the version of Star Wars where Luke doesn't get handed a plane and the Rebels lose because none of them know to reach out with their feelings.

I don't know if you noticed, but it's not like Pike, Spock, or Kirk had a fleet behind them.  They were alone in the fight, the situation changed.  They were dealing with the first known instance of TIME TRAVEL and were stranded without communication with their superiors against a threat of a level none of them had encountered- and it was essentially a ship crewed with teachers and students.  This is like when Hogwarts goes to war in Deathly Hallows.

It's much more difficult for me to swallow that we can atomically disassemble human beings and reassemble them elsewhere than it is for me to believe that a determined human being not particularly concerned with rules can rise to a position of power.  One of those should sound way more real life familiar to you than another.

*ignites saber*

Lets fucking do this, fucker.

You say that like I wasn't right there with ya, buddy.  I'm 21, remember?  I went and saw Space Cowboys with my dad, it was the first time I saw ANY of those guys in a movie, and I thought it was AWESOME.

Especially when Two-Face flies a rocket to the moooon.  Or however that movie ends.