26

(85 replies, posted in Episodes)

I want someone to warp the Cinema Sins concept into something horrifically insensitive and wrong with the 9/11 Sins idea Trey suggested or a Stormfront version for Schindler's List with stuff like "if they're burning bodies, why isn't all the wood engulfed in flames" *DING*, "actually, typhus was the reason for the shaved heads" *DING*, and "all these people at the end are liars" *DING*.

27

(56 replies, posted in Episodes)

THE ANSWER TO 28 ABY IS 0 BBY!

28

(56 replies, posted in Episodes)

Invid wrote:
Ewing wrote:

Ask yourselves, why is it okay to exterminate Xenomorphs but wrong if it's a tribe of Tusken Raiders?

So many ways to answer this, but the idea that you're just trolling is too great. Not worth it.

Typical elitist New Republic response. You people have gotten to the point where it's only a matter of time until you stand up for the Borg's right to exist too.

Doctor Submarine wrote:

This is just life in Obama's Galaxy, Ewing.

I'm not saying things were better under the Empire but at least they knew how to handle obvious threats to their prosperity.

29

(56 replies, posted in Episodes)

Ask yourselves, why is it okay to exterminate Xenomorphs but wrong if it's a tribe of Tusken Raiders? They're both inherently hostile lifeforms incapable of a peaceful coexistence with any other sentient being. You cheer when Ripley eradicates LV-426 of the Xenomorph infestation but shed a tear when Anakin Skywalker kills a tribe of Tusken Raiders who gangraped his mother to death. Is there any one of us who wouldn't have acted the same way as Anakin in that situation?

The comparisons to the Jewish people and Native Americans are asinine. We're not talking about a different race of homo sapien that is ultimately the same as us on a genetic level, we're talking about an entirely different species that rapes, pillages and kills everything it can. Again, their coming of age ritual involves capturing and torturing another living being to death. Why is this behavior excused? Tatooine being their homeland is hardly an understandable reason for their aggressive actions towards humans. You don't see Jawas committing such heinous acts. In fact, Jawas are a valued member of the Tatooine society and economy even if stereotypes and prejudices exist against them. They've at least made an attempt to join a diverse society made up of species from all around the galaxy; a society the Tusken Raiders continually attack at every opportunity. Further more, Tatooine isn't a piece of land that is being "stolen", it's an entire planet, with plenty of room for everyone, yet the Tusken Raiders refuse to share it with anyone who isn't them. The apologist culture has to stop if the people of Tatooine are to ever live in peace. Dismissing and excusing the destructive, isolationist, xenophobic, and criminal behavior they've displayed over and over again, without any evidence on the contrary, is akin to defending and accepting Palpatine's war crimes because they are a part of his "Sith Culture".

30

(56 replies, posted in Episodes)

http://i.imgur.com/j01UTUt.gif

Anakin Skywalker did nothing wrong.

The Tusken Raiders are savage subhumans. Give me one good reason why they shouldn't be wiped out. There isn't a single redeeming quality about them. The only action any of them has ever expressed is "relentlessly try to murder anyone who isn't one of them".

They're constantly attacking people, even when those people are minding their own business. Their coming of age tradition involves capturing a living being and torturing it to death. Anakin's mother lived in the same desert ranch for years until one day when they showed up and gangraped her to death. They also randomly shoot at podracers. Imagine if every NASCAR race some Taliban member showed up and started taking potshots at Tony Stewart. We would be rightfully outraged and demand their eradication.

They live in easily identifiable campsites and within small enough tribes that a a small group of people with blasters could wipe out a whole village with relative ease. Why aren't they all dead? No one one would be sad if they all died. Anakin took the initiative when no one else would. Sure, it wasn't for the best reason, but his actions were completely justified in his actions.

The only thing Anakin did incorrectly was comparing them to animals. Animals are useful; they can be tamed or harvested. Tusken Raiders are more like a virus. As in everyone else's lives will be measurably improved once a concerted effort is actually made to get rid of them.

31

(127 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Nathan M wrote:

To this day I still laugh out loud when the phrase 'Oh my god I forgot about robot heaven' is said.

32

(40 replies, posted in Off Topic)

I just saw it and I thought it was really solid but not the new gold standard for blockbusters or anything like that. It's well-written, which is an absolute shock after reading that abomination of a draft last autumn, so kudos to whoever clean that shit up. I really enjoyed the editing with the resets and the clever way of showing scenes to us for the first time while Cage has experienced them about 50 times already. However, I thought the characters were very boring. I can't really tell you anything about Cage and Rita as people and even on a surface level, there's not much to them, although Cruise and Blunt gave fine performances.

My biggest gripe are the action scenes. They're all very cookie cutter and indistinguishable from any other PG-13 sci-fi action film over the past decade. There's not a single noteworthy moment that inspired any semblance of awe in me. It's a damn shame because I thought the designs of the creatures and the weaponry had a lot of potential for innovative and unique scenes. Some of the scenes described in the script sounded tremendous but were incredibly mundane on screen.

There's an episode of South Park where Cartman sees something so funny that it ruins his sense of humor forever. He can't laugh at anything anymore even when he knows it's supposed to be funny. I think the same thing happened with me this year when I saw The Raid 2. It has ruined my appreciation and excitement over action scenes. I know I'm supposed to have my adrenaline flowing when I see stuff like Edge of Tomorrow but it's just not there anymore. Gareth Evans has destroyed an entire genre for me.

Beyond The Mat

Book it, unlike Dennis Stamp.

34

(127 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Teague wrote:

Fun fact, because of you sorry goddamned assholes, we're doing an intermission this weekend called PLOT HOLE FILM CRITICISM.

Didn't you already record a commentary for Prometheus?

35

(127 replies, posted in Off Topic)

I don't always agree with Mark Kermode but his rants about shit I hate are so well articulated and entertaining that I love the guy.

36

(73 replies, posted in Episodes)

I'm not politically motivated enough to like or dislike any piece of fiction for ideological reasons. Not everyone shares my beliefs and I don't expect to see them represented and/or appealed to in everything I watch. This goes to back some of the shit I was saying about True Detective a few months ago:

I understand criticizing a film or show through structural analysis, aesthetic criticism, genre criticism, auteur theory, and so on, because those have to do with the actual filmmaking and storytelling. I may not agree with it, but at least there is a degree of objectivity and it's trying to better understand how films and shows work. I can't take social criticism of media seriously. All of it boils down to the author projecting their own political and social ideologies onto the work. There is no objectivity or true criticism of the piece, it's just a soapbox for the critic to explain why something sucks because it doesn't cater to their desires and values. It's film criticism for people who don't understand the nuances of filmmaking or storytelling. It is the absolute laziest way to critique any work.

As soon as we start bringing in self-congratulating tidbits like "maybe you hate women if you dislike this movie so much" and "I dislike this movie because it disrespects women", we get distracted by actual analysis and devolve into a debate where it's like we're trying to prove our moral superiority based on our taste in movies. It's an adaptation of a young adult romance novel, not Mein Kampf. Obviously, nobody in here is purposefully or even unintentionally turning the debate into a series of self-righteous exchanges, but those comments come off as embarrassing to me.

I dislike Twilight because I can't connect with the material and I think it's extremely hokey. Teenage romance does nothing for me. That doesn't mean a film can't come along that does it well enough that I'll like it, but for the time being I've yet to see a teenage romance story that I've enjoyed. Call me shallow, ignorant or petty and I'll probably agree with you but I just have a hard time caring about 16 year olds finding true love even though the world doesn't want them to be together or some such shit. It's just too absurd for me and unintentionally comedic when you throw in stakes like the fate of the universe depending on their love. I think it's cheap wish fulfillment for sexually repressed teenagers in the same way The Raid 2 is wish fulfillment for violence junkies like myself. Of course there are people who do connect with the material and that's totally fine. I'm sure some of them are just as turned off by The Raid 2 as I am by Twilight.

However, I really want to get wasted with my buddies and watch the last installment of the franchise. I have to see any movie that features this:

SPOILER Show
http://media.giphy.com/media/qQFkyrp4h7HGg/giphy.gif

Doctor Submarine wrote:

Shit, let's see the Dogme-95 version of Game of Thrones.

I don't know if I can handle that glory.

38

(127 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Doctor Submarine wrote:
Dorkman wrote:

they need to do everything in the books exactly liek in the books except the parts i don't like they should do it the different way i want

/r/asoiaf is fucking insufferable this morning. I mean, I was whining on Twitter last night, but I can still acknowledge that there was a lot of great stuff in this episode. People are acting like the loss of "wherever whores go" and him crying after killing Shae is some betrayal of Tyrion's character, as if depression and melancholy won't be just as dramatically interesting as rage and frustration.

The incident with Tysha was Tywin's one irredeemable and unjustifiable act. He's always acted coldly and without remorse but he never exploited an innocent life to make a petty and cruel point to someone. Tyrion killing Tywin because of what went down with Tysha, and everything that happened since, feels like more justified and natural penance.

Also, Tyrion's rage and depression about being fucked over his whole life by Tywin in that scene makes infinitely more sense if you include the stuff about Tysha. If you're having this big moment with Tyrion getting out his anger, omitting that tidbit doesn't make any sense. It would be akin to Walter White letting the stuff about Grey Matter subside; it's the entire crux of his bitterness. Changing Tyrion's motivation to Shae's betrayal doesn't work as well because the stuff with Tysha was the moment he realized his father would never love him.

Plus, "wherever whores go" is the perfect line to cause Tyrion to fully snap and shoot him.

That's why I wasn't fan of how things happened last night.

I did miss Tywin being such an piece of shit and saying "wherever whores go".

Trey wrote:
Squiggly_P wrote:

Something happened differently?

The only thing that happened differently in any significant way was actually an improvement on the events in the books.

I wouldn't go that far. The motivation and dialogue for the stuff with Jamie, Tyrion and Tywin was altered to such an extent that it lost some of it's impact on me.

bullet3 wrote:

Still think they dropped the ball by having the Stannis arrival in this episode instead of episode 9. I always pictured it as a "Gandalf saves Helms Deep in the last inning" moment. The way it ends up playing out in this finale, it's almost a non-event, instead of the "fuck yeah Stannis" moment it should be.

Amen to that.

Cleganebowl is true. I can see it in the fire.

43

(7 replies, posted in Creations)

Invid wrote:

S4E08 won't play unless you go to youtube, apparently.

Works for me. It might have to do with the stupid third party content rules on the site.

44

(7 replies, posted in Creations)

The four new endings - S1E1, S1E6, S3E9 and S4E4 - are all up on the main post.

45

(23 replies, posted in Episodes)

Yep, I'm a dumbass and didn't see that. It does amaze me though that every single film discussion these days somehow always leads back to superhero movies. I see it time and time again around campus, in class, at bars, with friends, and everywhere else. It's pretty amusing that it's become the major reference point for everything, almost like how Star Wars was for decades. We're talking about Night of the Hunter for fuck sake, can't we focus on Robert Mitchum chilling performance and the incredible cinematography?

46

(23 replies, posted in Episodes)

Eddie, are you posting in the right topic?

47

(7 replies, posted in Creations)

Also, I'll provide updates on progress throughout the thread for all two people who might actually care. I currently have 4 more completed videos waiting to be uploaded later tonight once YouTube stops acting like shit.

One of the things I've noticed about Game of Thrones is that nearly every episode has a major plot changing dramatic moment that can be absolutely ruined with just a change of soundtrack or a few edits. I usually think of ways to corrupt those scenes in my head and laugh to myself about them. Now that it's the summer and I have a lot more free time, I've decided to actually edit these scenes for my own amusement, and hopefully yours too. I'll be the first to admit that I have a very dumb sense of humor, so it's entirely possible these will only be funny to me.

I've made a list of about 35 that I want to edit and I plan on creating them all over the next couple of months. Instead of littering this thread and the two Game of Thrones topics with these videos, I'm going to house them here and update this main post with new releases throughout the summer. Not all of these will be the actual episode endings, but as a personal preference, I think this shit is way funnier when it cuts to black and the credits roll. Obviously, if you're not caught up completely with the show, don't watch any of these.

Any and all feedback / reactions / opinions is appreciated.

Thanks. I have ideas for about 10 of those "alternate endings" throughout the series that I'm gonna make over the next week or two.

Dorkman wrote:

Oh, bless your heart.

Like this?