1,276

(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

I keep meaning to sit down and have dinner with Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie, but I keep getting interrupted.

1,277

(4 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Pshh. I wish. After the first episode, they have a prostitute take off her clothes every couple of episodes.

1,278

(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Sam F wrote:

Okay, here's my entire current iTunes movie library. I use my Apple TV to watch them. SO much more convenient than DVDs.

At least half my collection isn't available for streaming. And you can't stream director's commentaries or other extras—or even subtitles, for the most part.

http://www.zarban.com/pics/zarban-hipster.jpg

1,279

(19 replies, posted in Off Topic)

That's pretty awesome, except I kept wondering if it was supposed to be the Middle Ages or what. What Medieval girl ran around in trousers, a camisole top, and boots with short, two-toned hair? Cyberpunk Medieval girls?

Also, that twist was a huge cheat. Like, almost Wild Things huge.

1,280

(4 replies, posted in Off Topic)

I just finished Game of Thrones season 1, and I have to say, I'm really not feeling the love. Sopranos, I got. Solid character-based drama with a sense of humor and subtlety. There's nothing that's subtle about Game of Thrones. Here's what I've learned....

  1. Make every character say exactly what they're thinking, except when a character is lying to set up a power play.

  2. In any conversation, always have at least one character insult another character, even if it damages a relationship they'd rather not damage.

  3. If a conversation is with or about a bastard child, eunuch, dwarf, prostitute, or foreigner, always include direct references to that fact.

  4. Make sure that no one treats noblemen and -women or even royalty with much respect or subservience. Have the nobles and royals angrily growl their demands again at the servants who defy them.

  5. Any character who has any power should always use that power and never simple persuasion or bargaining to get what he or she wants.

  6. This isn't really Medieval Europe, so ignore historical norms. Make executions somber instead of cheery (people used to LOVE executions: they were getting rid of murderers and such). Have noblemen say that their hands are tied by laws which in fact they themselves decree and execute. Ignore the idea of feudal obligations of fealty. And don't worry about out of place things like "mountain lions".

  7. Plot the story as you would any episodic mystery show with a long arc about politics in the background. Then remove the mystery plot and just leave only the politics subplot.

  8. Treat "dire wolves" exactly like dogs. They should be loyal, protective, and trainable. They should even bark.

  9. When in doubt, tits out.

  10. Give every character a rich backstory. Make all of them about random cruelty.

1,281

(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

I find it strange that UK releases have all those colored certificate icons all over them. It's one thing to require them prominently displayed on the back or something, but on the spine?

Somehow the empire survived for hundreds of years without books being labeled that way....

re: number of commentaries... By my count, John Pavlich has released 171 commentaries. Teague has participated in 160 released commentaries. That puts the two of them among the top 4 or so* most prolific commentators and THE top-producing MOVIE commentators.

* The others are Al Jean and Mike Scully, one or both of whom are on nearly every commentary on The Simpsons boxed sets, but those are 22-minute TV eps. (Note: this doesn't count MST3K episodes as "commentaries".)

Owen Ward wrote:

That is pretty Struzanesque! I wish more movie posters were like that.

I wish more Struzan posters were boobalicious like that.

1,283

(3 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Not only does that image look great, but if I recall correctly that scene is Kane applauding what is actually a pretty crummy performance by his mistress....  lol

1,284

(19 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Squiggly_P wrote:

Budget was 45,000 Euros, which I believe roughly estimates to about $6 Million.

That really really slick. Well acted; great effects. Storywise, I suspect Rod Serling got there first, but the execution is terrific.

1,285

(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

TheMargarineMan wrote:

Do I spy Wallace and Gromit within your collection?!

Yep. Curse of the Were-Rabbit, anyway.

*searches for W&G shorts, finds VHS tapes, adds W&G shorts Blu-ray to Amazon cart*

1,286

(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

The odd things at the top of the first pic are 750 GB hard drives that are extensions to my DVR and together hold about 300 HD movies.

http://www.zarban.com/pics/collection1.jpg
http://www.zarban.com/pics/collection2.jpg
http://www.zarban.com/pics/collection3.jpg
http://www.zarban.com/pics/collection4.jpg
http://www.zarban.com/pics/collection5.jpg
http://www.zarban.com/pics/collection6.jpg
http://www.zarban.com/pics/collection7.jpg

Glad we did this. Now I can see what I have in my collection even when I'm traveling.

Discoveries:

  • Hey, I own Monty Python's Meaning of Life!

  • Hey, I own The Magnificent Seven!

  • Hey, where's The Simpsons Eighth Season?

  • Hey, where are Fringe seasons 1 and 2?

  • Hey, I own a LOT of children's movies for a guy who does not own children

  • Hey, my Hovitos fertility idol has become separated from my Indiana Jones movies

1,287

(32 replies, posted in Episodes)

  • Wizard of Oz

  • Godfather

  • Star Wars

  • Casablanca

  • Citizen Kane

Watch those five movies, and you'll have a solid foundation in American cinema and Western culture. Plus, you'll get nearly every movie reference on The Simpsons. Citizen Kane is the only one of those I don't adore.

1,288

(1,649 replies, posted in Off Topic)

That's hilarious, altho some are unfair. "Look at my face", "ya think?", and a few others are just common sayings anybody might put in a script.

Jimmy B wrote:

Yeah, I don't really see the problem, he likes reusing his own lines from time to time, I don't think it's a crime.

Well, the point is that Sorkin's characters don't talk like three-dimensional individual people. They all talk like Aaron Sorkin.

I'll tell you what's unforgivable....

Nobody ever says it cheerfully when friends arrive unexpectedly.

Oh. How nice for you.

http://www.zarban.com/zarban-green-with-jealousy.jpg

Jimmy B wrote:

Listening to Tysto's commentary for Licence to Kill, I discovered he has a man crush on Benicio Del Toro big_smile

Can you blame him? Look at this!

http://www.moviemarket.com/library/photos/286/286872.jpg

Can you even tell which one is Benicio Del Toro and which one is Talisa Soto?!

1,291

(67 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Jesus. You people.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-3R42Y44VyGA/T1j_hCqZqYI/AAAAAAAAAME/jvUZVSd6NOw/s1600/hug.jpg

1,292

(7 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Yeah, broken families are naturally just more interesting, so everything from Greek mythology to folk tales to comic book superheroes to sitcoms are full of orphans and children of single parents and women impregnated by gods.

That last one is admittedly less common today, but I think it's true of at least one character on Glee.

1,293

(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

All this can be yours if you get a steady job, and eschew John Barleycorn, nicotine, and the temptations of Eve.

1,294

(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Sister has my camera, but here's a placeholder from a couple of years ago....

http://www.zarban.com/movie-collection.jpg

1,295

(33 replies, posted in Episodes)

Yeah, it was alright for a while. It kind of fell apart last season.

Invid wrote:

Well, that's a case of the Green Lanterns being modeled after E.E. 'Doc' Smith's Lensemen stories, and Lucas dipping into that same source for the Jedi.

But even so, they didn't need to make the scenes with Sinestro resemble the Jedi Council scenes in the prequels. Arrange the dudes in two rows or a half-circle or on screens or walking thru in a garden or sitting around a table—anything.

EDIT: And to be clear, I don't think a movie needs a big, elaborate training sequence or even an '80s montage set to a cool rock song. Just indicate the passage of time at some point, so the hero's training isn't 3 continuous minutes.

Xtroid wrote:

Green Lantern was a mess, like Spider-Man 3... too many villains, too many subplots, too much going on. It felt like three movies in one.

Also, Ryan Reynolds stinks.

I haven't seen a lot of Ryan Reynolds, but he seemed fine here. I don't know what you mean by "too many villains" and "two many subplots". The stuff on Oa was focused on Parallax, and the stuff with Hector was directly related. Only the romantic subplot was unrelated to the central conflict.

The story IS messy, tho. The themes of living up to responsibilities and conquering fear are repeated but not really demonstrated. If flying an experimental airplane to the edge of space isn't conquering your fear of dying in a fiery airplane crash, I don't know how defeating a space monster IS.

I watched Green Lantern last night. It's very much by-the-numbers, but there's nothing particularly objectionable. It cribs a lot from the Star Wars prequels, of all things, for the Green Lantern Corps.

Also, I'm baffled as to why film makers don't want to give a hero a proper training montage. It's all "Try to do this. No, no, no! You're hopeless!" Then the apprentice flips the master and training is over.

In all, if it had had some sharper dialog, it would have been a good superhero movie.

1,299

(449 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Hmmm. The previous trailer made it look less like a revenge fantasy and more like a fairy tale of desperation.

Hmmm, sounds like this is a film ripe for a forum member commentary....