[I wrote this up for my movie review blog post to go up this weekend, but I see no reason not to post it here early. And by the way, good work, Seth Brower.]
Early on in the film, in which the Muppets have all long since gone their separate ways but need to get the gang back together for One More Show, there’s a scene where Kermit (and his new friends Jason Segel, Amy Adams, and Segel’s Marty Stu muppet stand-in Walter) finds Fozzie (his voice somewhat off due to Frank Oz’s declining to participate in the film) singing with a knock-off Muppet cover band (the “Moopets”) in Reno. As he comes offstage, they greet him with forced, grimacey smiles and say (paraphrased) “Hey, your show was… it was great. Really good to see you.” They don’t mean the first part. But they mean the second with all their hearts.
The scene perfectly encapsulates my feelings about the film, as well as the film itself. The gang isn’t back together — some of them are the original members but several signifiant ones are impersonators (although, to be fair, much more credible ones than the Moopets); the original members, I care deeply about, and it hurts a little to see them veer so close to self-parody just to get another shot at entertaining an audience. The film is far too self-aware for my taste. It tries to be an 80s movie, complete with evil corporate villain whom they have to defeat by Putting On a Show, but it’s constantly nudge-winking the audience going “Hey, remember these movies? They were silly, right? We’re too cool for this room, you and me, but let’s play along, let them have their fun.” (Said corporate villain, for example, says “maniacal laugh” instead of laughing maniacally where a movie villain would do so.) For a film that thematically tries to make a point of rejecting cynicism, it’s a really jarring tonal choice.
I’m not against self-aware humor — CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MEATBALLS, which I adore, is wall-to-wall with it — but it felt wrong here. I think it could have worked as parody if it were a parody of Muppet movies with parody Muppets. But it’s actually meant to be the Muppets as the Muppets, and they don’t always feel like they’re in on the joke.
It feels weird to be giving this film what amounts to a negative review when critics have praised it almost unanimously — lo, I am become Armond White, destroyer of flawless tomatometers. This is, to be sure, a far less demeaning film than MUPPETS FROM SPACE appeared to be (I could not even bring myself to see that one). This is a film that sprang, very clearly, from a place of deep love and affection, not one of simply monetizing a piece of intellectual property. Jason Segel loves the Muppets, he adores the Muppets, and I don’t begrudge him spending his get-things-made Hollywood capital to bring them back and share them with the world. But it feels like so much fan fiction, a fan film in which he’s inserted himself into Muppet canon and talked the Muppets into appearing as themselves (and Disney into bankrolling it).
And again, I don’t begrudge him. It’s inspiring, in a way, to see him live what I have no doubt was exactly the childhood dream he wrote as Walter’s, inspiring to see a film that feels like Segel reaching out to me and saying “You and I, we get this. These guys are awesome. Isn’t this awesome?” I don’t even watch How I Met Your Mother and I’ve barely seen Segel in anything, but I still feels like a buddy of mine got his dearest wish and I’m proud for him. You can see how much this means to him, even when he isn’t flat-out telling you so through Walter. Yet as with SUPER 8, it expends more effort reminding me of how awesome the other stuff is than actually being awesome itself. I don’t want movies to keep making me nostalgic for 20 years ago. I want movies that I can be nostalgic for 20 years from now.
At its best, the Muppets feel like themselves again (even when they’re not). The recreated Muppet Show intro number is a moment of real "they're back!" joy, brief as it is. But when Segel/Walter and their story insist on stepping into the spotlight, the Muppets are in turn forced out of it, and feel like they’re being commanded to behave in a different way, commanded to serve the film instead of the film serving them. For the first time in my life, I watched the Muppets and they felt like puppets.
This isn’t their lowest point, and it might even be the start of a new era. It’s a major Hollywood big-budget release, not some trashy Reno lounge; but it still isn’t quite where I would have wanted to find them, not what I’d want to see them having to do to prove their continued relevance, not after what they’ve meant to me. But goddammit, Muppets, for all of that: it’s really good to see you.