Re: Playing with Structure: "Death Flight"

Love it! Just one little thing.... That ending. It's a downer, man. That's not gonna test well. Don't worry, tho. We can massage it. </Hollywood>

As I see it, we've got:

  • A sample of super-flu being transported from Asia to the US after a horrible but covered-up outbreak that gives some victims violent zombie-like symptoms

  • An accidental catastrophic event that breaks the super-flu container and infects the cabin

In the air:

  • An Asian CDC courier now dying from super-flu and violently infecting other passengers

  • A lovely Asian girl who as been flirting with him and who tragically becomes his first victim

  • A troubled young pilot who wants to see his family again, except for his ex-wife

  • An older co-pilot with a chip on his shoulder and a cocaine problem who is probably going to do something rash

  • Assorted other passengers including Sigourney Weaver and a pre-schooler*

* This should result in a zombie Sigourney Weaver and zombie pre-schooler. Cf. DIF Ghostbusters commentary

On the ground:

  • A lesbian airplane expert turning her life around from a failed traditional marriage to the troubled young pilot

  • A fresh-faced lesbian CDC super-flu expert who secretly feels that the flight is doomed because of what crazy shit had to secretly be done in Asia to contain the outbreak

  • A pragmatic but not ruthless Army general empowered by the president to divert the plane to a nearby military base because he also has knowledge of the Asia containment operation

Act 1
Lack of personnel in Asia owing to the recent super-flu outbreak causes stress fractures in the aircraft to go unnoticed. The doomed courier/cute girl head-fake kicks off the outbreak. The panicked crew struggles to keep the plane from crashing with the help of the airplane expert ex-wife of the pilot, who fears the pilot may buckle under the stress.

The CDC scientist enters, explains the problem to the crew, and sets the ticking clock. The two lesbians make a connection.

Act 2
The airplane crew stabilizes the plane, but the cockpit situation gets intense, with both pilots making some poor decisions. They try to contain the outbreak on-board, resulting in some gruesome action scenes. Intercut with this: the Army general enters ground control, takes charge, and orders the plane diverted. The CDC scientist reluctantly agrees, angering the airplane expert and creating their romantic break.

The plane changes course. The coked-up co-pilot--now paranoid and terrified--starts killing everyone who he imagines to be infected, and ends up infected himself. He is reluctantly subdued by the young pilot and uninfected passengers/fight attendants.

Act 3
The crippled plane lands at the military base and is greeted by a hazmat team and armed soldiers, who separate survivors from victims with brutal efficiency, while the pilot--a changed man--controls the situation and thanks his ex-wife, who congratulates him. The infected and coked-up co-pilot escapes in the confusion. The CDC scientist saves the life of the airplane expert, repairing their romantic connection. The Army general and his men go after the co-pilot in a sudden, desperate man-hunt...

THE END(?)

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries

Re: Playing with Structure: "Death Flight"

Well. I have no objections to this. That's just a movie right there.

Anybody, thoughts? We could start drafting in a detailed 9-part treatment now.

Teague Chrystie

I have a tendency to fix your typos.

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Re: Playing with Structure: "Death Flight"

That's a movie I'd watch.

Y'all know my prejudices by now. I tend to like challenging, mature (hate that word but I don't have a better one), naturalistic, dark stuff. If it were me writing this, I'd have those things in mind. By that I don't mean that it should be any of those, just that that's where I tend naturally to go if left on my own.

Totally random thought: a 747 is a fucking enormous airplane, with lots of spaces the passengers don't normally see. Good opportunities for set pieces there.

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Re: Playing with Structure: "Death Flight"

Yeah, I like it so far. Maybe also introduce the element that perhaps the outbreak in Asia hasn't been fully contained.

Which will form much of the motivation for the military and CDC to help the plane... or rather the pilot because in my mind, he's actually the cure everyone's looking for. He's the only guy on the plane who hasn't shown any symptoms, so everyone in the States wants to get him because he's holding the key to what is a killer virus sweeping through Asia. But landing that plane anywhere on the ground means a strong possibility that a new outbreak will start. So one of the conflicts in the story is that half the people in 'mission control' want him to land so they can get him and turn him into a lab rat, and the other half want to blow the plane to bits because they have no confidence in their ability to contain the virus wherever he lands... since the Chinese are doing it really badly. Towards the end, it could be revealed that CNN has reports of the virus in Europe. So, do they go for what could be the cure and risk the virus running unchecked across the US, or do they lose the potential cure and try to close all borders and stop the virus getting anywhere near US soil? Both sides are right but the debate will mean that people on the ground have some sort of drama for themselves (aside from romance and playing agony aunt over the radio).

I don't know, I just think the people on the ground need to be in some sort of jeopardy. But without going too far into 'military is bad' territory.

Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere. - Carl Sagan

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Re: Playing with Structure: "Death Flight"

redxavier wrote:

I don't know, I just think the people on the ground need to be in some sort of jeopardy. But without going too far into 'military is bad' territory.

I'd try and limit it to something just the one or three characters the audience is suppose to care about and need by a certain time. Our hero needs the plane to make it to HIS airport, and not be diverted or shot down. Maybe something's being smuggled and his family will get whacked if it doesn't show up...

I write stories! With words!
http://www.asstr.org/~Invid_Fan/

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