Topic: Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse.
These guys have me scared now, so I thought about it harder this morning than I ever have before. Here's what I came up with.
(This isn't about where to hide or what not to do when it happens. This is simply preparing a duffel bag for when it does.)
We're gonna use modern, Snyder/Boyle zombies. They start as fast as their human counterparts, and only eventually become slow as they decay.
Ramen bricks.
They stack easily, you could probably fit twice of what you see here inside (the graphic doesn't illustrate depth, after all), they can be eaten dry and will expand in your stomach for that extra bit of full-feeling. That's fifty bricks. You could probably last as many days, but we'll assume you could definitely last twenty-five - almost a month - without needing to forage or steal from your compatriots.
Books.
Seems like an odd choice - this isn't a desert island, it's a fucking zombie apocalypse - but if we've learned anything at this point, the real enemy is human nature. Don't be the one to go insane - read books to keep your wits about you.
Duraflame log.
I'm packing two. (Again, consider depth.) For those who don't know, this is a chunky, gooey chemical brick used to start a fire. But with a log of this size - and staying indoors, as we are, where those no wind - we could divide just one of these into a hundred or more sugar-cube-sized bricks of fire-starting joy.
Matches.
Should be obvious.
Spray paint.
Less obvious. It is not my intention to ever fight a zombie - because fighting one is easy, but once there are a few around and you start to lose track, things get bad fast. That said, it'd be irresponsible not to pack a weapon of some sort. I decided on aerosol-based cans because, combined with matches (or better yet, a Duraflame cube on a stick) you can create a flamethrower good for as long as the can is full.
Why did I go with paint? I thought about this for a while, considering different products - but paint is the only one that will alert outside military forces to your presence. You'll have enough to wall-scribble how many survivors are in your encampment, and five minutes of flamethrower capability, in one can. I'm packing four. Could potentially blind zombies as well, we'll find out.
Tools.
A hammer and as many nails as can slip into the cracks of the duffel. This way, regardless of where your encampment is, you have some ability to form larger weapons out of scraps of your environmental assets. When you're out of those, you have a hammer.
A knife for cutting everything. It's the apocalypse, go crazy. Couches, orcas, whatever you have around. Probably most useful for food and cutting up your Duraflame cubes.
Bag of medicine.
You're going to want a lot of Ambien and a lot of Ibuprofen. Ibuprofen for general pains, Ambien for tranquilizing others who are beginning to go insane. Note to self: consider replacing Ambien with heroin.
Two liter-bottles of gasoline.
Break glass in case of emergency stuff, this is. With no intentions of leaving the camp, the immediate use of the gasoline is as a last-ditch way to put some fire on things. But, if you reach day whatever and it's time to go out, the last thing you want to do in your panicked sprint and lunge for the nearest vehicle is grab a car only to find out it's mostly empty after hitting the road.
Rope.
It's called rope for a reason: you can use it for anything. (That's why they call it rope, right? I don't know the etymology of rope.) Tying up things, tying down things, lifting things, pulling things, swinging things, hanging things. There's really only one thing rope can't do, and you can make that happen if you're horny enough.
What do you think of my duffel? I tried to be very considerate of space and the requirements of the place I'm at. I didn't pack water, that was a cost-benefit analysis. Weighing the chances that I'll have a water source at the time with the limited space of the duffel, I opted out of packing any and stored more practical supplies.
What would you change? Preparedness is important.
I have a tendency to fix your typos.