It's sooo damn pretty! And that video...Oh man! I'm interested to know what equipment & software iJim used.

So, all the time stamping we did over the summer, that will be put to use eventually, yes? Just checking.

BTW, I'm a big fan of how the box art for the episode is used as a blurred, sort of bokeh backdrop!

"You're killing me, Smalls."

Whenever someone says something that I find frustrating/ridiculous, I quote that line from The Sandlot.... I've said it a lot over the years.

I recently revisited Time Bandits for a weekly movie review podcast I do, and I just don't understand why some people love it so much. I find it clunky, meandering and not that funny. Also, it's one of those movies that just ends, leaving the main character alone, homeless and not really having grown or learned anything from the "adventure" of the movie. Yes, there's the heavy-handed message of materialism being bad ("Don't touch it! It's evil!"), but nobody actually learns that or benefits from it in the end. It's just something the movie keeps telling us.

As for a classic that I undeerstand why it's considered great, I just don't think it necessarily should be, is Goodfellas. I think half of that movie is interesting. The rest of it, not so much. There's no good reason it needed to be as long as it is. A Scorsese picture that I think I'm the sole fan of (mostly because the world has forgotten about it and they're too busy praising his other stuff), is After Hours. That movie is often (and sometimes simultaneously) funny, intense, sad and surprising all within a brisk, beautifully shot running time. I'm normally not into movies where the protagonist just keeps getting shit on the whole time, but this and Barton Fink are exceptions.

By that logic, one can't care about characters in a comedy, and we both know that's just not true. I don't know about you, but in movies such as The Mask, Army Of Darkness and Big Trouble In Little China, I cared whether the characters succeeded or failed in life. I think the reason for that can be broken down into three factors: Sympathy, Empathy and Vulnerability (Humility is also a subset of that last one).

We feel bad for these people when they fall on their asses or the universe kicks them when they're down (Sympathy), mostly because we can understand their plight and relate to what they're feeling in some way (Empathy), which in turn makes them human, flawed and we see that their lives aren't perfect (Vulnerability/Humility). Stanley Ipkiss is a Lovable Loser who the movie literally classifies as the Nice Guy Finishes Last character. Not only that, but he sees a body in the water and dives into that crap (in his suit!), attempting to "save the cat". Jack Burton and Ash are both loud, pompous blowhards who think they're super cool, but mostly aren't. However, they're constantly reminded of just how cool they're not, and they soldier on anyway, striving to be the heroes they see themselves to be.

Now, you seem to be suggesting that there's no one to care about/root for in Planet Terror because everyone is either too silly or bad-ass too much of the time. I urge you to take a closer look. Cherry Darling is estranged from the only man she ever loved, she's jobless and she's lost her fucking leg! No more dancing and no more dreams of being a stand-up comic, especially thanks to the zombie apocalypse! Later, her true love is killed (after having just recently reunited)! Thankfully, he's given her a child and she meets Dakota Block, so it all works out, more or less.

Speaking of, Dakota Block is also a solid example of my "Three Laws of Character Building that I just made up, just now, aren't I amaze-great?". Though she is initially cheating on her Husband (and I am strongly opposed to infidelity of any kind. I don't care how bad things are. If you want to be with someone else, you have to separate from the person you're with now! You can't have your cake and fuck it, too. I digress.), it's obviously a loveless and even dangerous marriage. After all, she has a child to think about. So there's that, her fingers and hands are broken (a bunch, but they are miraculously healed once the drug wears off, which is HEY LOOK OVER THERE! A DIVERSION!), her Husband's a psycho, her only other prospect gets her brains scooped out like so much Rocky Road ice cream AND her little boy is fucking dea-- I mean alive! YAY, REBEL! WOOO! Thankfully, she meets another Smokin' Hottie-Turned Actress/Singer in the form of Cherry Darling, who ends up with a child she gets to help raise, so Dakota wins at life (MAKE IT BETTER FOR DAKOTAAAA!!!).

I could go on about the other characters, but you get the idea.

In Death Proof (Dammit! You made me do this!), there are two groups of girls and BOTH are kind of vapid, self-absorbed and they shuck all social and/or career responsibilities so they can goof off, inconsiderate of (and in some cases, at the expense of) others. The first group are the bigger offenders, but they do serve two important functions:
1. They represent the classic trope within these movies, of the young, promiscuous girl(s) who just want to do drugs and have sex, and of course they die for it.
2. We need to see them get killed by Stuntman Mike, so we can fully understand and appreciate how deadly he is in the second half.
Having said that, it could be argued that the scenes with Rose McGowan at the bar and in Mike's car do this just fine, and much, much faster (Personally, I would love to see a Fan Edit that cuts out the first group of girls, keeping Pam, but then we would lose most of Kurt Russell's performance).

The second group gabs endlessly about mundane bullshit (at least the long conversations in Pulp Fiction were interesting/fun to listen to). They pull a Richard Edson ("What country do you think this is?") and go joyriding in someone else's car. Granted, the guy probably deserved it (Trivia notes Jasper fully intended to rape Lee), but still... And speaking of, I kind of like Lee, mainly because I like Mary Elizabeth Winstead, particularly her delivery of the declaration, "Oh, I love Pretty In Pink!". Again with the digression.

The only character among them I truly care about is Zoe, who is charming and "real" throughout. A lot of that has to do with Zoe Bell just being literally and figuratively herself.

I went on for way longer than I expected to. I'll shut up now.

Speaking of Robert Rodriguez, his second film, Roadracers is presently streaming on Netflix Instant.

From Wikipedia: Roadracers is a 1994 made-for-television film directed by Robert Rodriguez, his second feature film following the success of his 1992 debut, El Mariachi. The film originally aired on Showtime Network as part of their Rebel Highway series that took the titles of 1950s-era B-movies and applied them to original films starring up-and-coming actors of the 1990s (including the likes of Alicia Silverstone and Shannen Doherty) and directed by established directors such as William Friedkin, Joe Dante, and Ralph Bakshi. Rodriguez was the only young director to participate in the series. The series was produced by the son and daughter of Samuel Z. Arkoff, the co-founder and producer of American International Pictures (AIP), the distributor of the films this series takes its titles from.
Robert Rodriguez's take concerned a rebel named Dude Delaney (David Arquette) who dreams of leaving his dead end small town and becoming a rockabilly star but gets caught up in a nasty feud with the town's local sheriff (William Sadler) and his son (Jason Wiles). Salma Hayek plays Dude's girlfriend, Donna.

Me again. If you've never seen it, it's worth at least one watch. It has yet to be released on DVD in the US. There's an Australian release you can purchase on Amazon. Those of you frustrated by Rodriguez's over-indulgence of CGI and bombastic action will be pleased to know this film contains neither. Due to its $1,000,000 budget and cable TV resources, it's refreshingly restrained.

Andy Grifith

1. Waitress, Nathan Fillion

Super, Kevin Bacon

Or...

Andy Grifith

1. Spy Hard, Barry Bostwick

2010: Moby Dick, Trey Stokes

Next...Bill Pullman

What Teague said.

I would also like to add: Yeeeeaaaahhhh!

What's on the slate this weekend, DiF? Depending on what it is, I think I'd like to trope again, if that's cool.

I hate you, FixedR6... Hard.

I agree with Teague. I think the length is just fine. What's most impressive to me is the sound mix/design. You did an excellent job pulling various lines from films and laying them on top of and along side one another. I think the line from The Shining was especially apt/funny.

P.S. Can I come live with you?

That begs the question, WOULD it be official? I mean, there are currently FOUR screen representations of The Joker. Caesar Romero, Jack Nicholson, Mark Hamill and Heath Ledger. They all have their own distinct voices, and they've all made their marks on the character.

Based on the popular line of action figures, it's The Sandals of Empire!

Rory Davenlee (Joel Courtney) is an introverted teen dying of soul cancer. He's secretly in love with his Step-Cousin, Jenna Vossten (Emma Stone), but his remaining days are numbered. One day, Rory's single Dad, Tom (Ryan Reynolds) is at work as the local Dog Catcher and finds a friendly, overweight Welsh Corgi named Empire, abandoned in an empty community pool. The dog was born without legs.

Tom brings the dog home to his son. Boy and dog form an immediate friendship. With the help of their eccentric neighbor, Dr. Rex McPkAnk (John Hurt), the Davenlees invent two pair of electric sandals and mobilize the happy dog. This reignites Rory's willpower to live. He beats his cancer and helps Empire win Best In Show at the National Dog Show!

Next Up: The Umpteenth Watermelon.

Totally...and then proceeds to overdo it, long after it was a good idea.

So, bringing it back on track...And please hear me out on this one: House Arrest (released summer of '96, but made more than a year before then).

House Arrest is about a family (headlined by Kevin Pollak and Jamie Lee Curtis) who are out of love with each other. They announce to their kids that separation is eminent. Their son can't accept it, and decides to lock his parents in the basement of their home and keep them there until they work things out.

A few of the kids in his class at school catch wind of this plan and decide to do the same to their own parents, but they bring their folks to the hero's basement (so as to keep things localized and together). As the groups of parents fight it out (including Jennifer Tilly, who is being punished for dressing like and acting like her daughter, played by Jennifer Love Hewitt, in order to not grow up and be her "best friend"), the groups of kids attempt to "play house", all with disastrous and mostly slapstick results.

By the end, Pollak and Curtis rediscover that spark, another couple get divorced but decide to become working partners and Tilly learns to grow up and be a parent (only not so much, but I'll get into that in a moment).

The problem with the movie, I feel, is not all of the ideas are executed to their fullest potential and the rest are played more for wacky, shallow, child-friendly comedy. For example, Wallace Shawn gets stuck in a window like Winnie the Pooh, Jamie Lee Curtis encounters rats, falls down a laundry chute and splits her pants, Ray Walston gets strung upside down from a tree and the kids make some horrible, junk-based dinner to feed their parents.

I feel to remake it into a "good" film (and some of these elements ARE there, which is why I kind of enjoy the film in its current state), it would be better to age the kids to adolescence (15 to 17), strip down the cast of characters on both sides, like putting some characters' arcs and issues into another. For instance, Make Tilly's character not just a big kid who is too sisterly to her daughter, but ALSO be the one to gain her husband's respect by becoming his equal partner in work, even though they still get divorced. It would also help to juxtapose the adults' arguments with the kids (now teens) upstairs, attempting to play house and be something of a functioning, domestic unit and discovering just how hard it can be, thus allowing them to relate to and sympathize with their respective parents. Finally, overhaul the tone and sense of humor to something much more smart and serious. Instead of a loud, obnoxious, half-hearted kids film, turn it into a charming, poignant family film.

If John Hughes were still with us, I'd throw his name in an instant to re-write and direct (but less Home Alone and more The Breakfast Club).