Hey all, I have been working on writing more and more to get it to a better quality as well as avoid the more technical style that comes from writing school papers. I'll be posting sections from my latest work in this thread and would appreciate any and all feedback 
The Crash
The ship rock slightly as Jayede pulled back hard on the control yoke. Her small space ship was slow to respond, as though it was being pulled through water, rather than the empty vacuum of space. Alarms sounded as her dimensional drive gave out completely, shaking her even further.
“Able, what’s our status report?” Jayede called out as she attempted to slow her forward speed. The ship’s artificial intelligence engine was silent before responding to her inquiry.
“Mistress Jayede, a gravity shadow in hyperspace dimension damaged our generators and compensators. I am detecting a planet approximately 2.5 hundred million spectra that might have generated the disturbance.”
“That makes no sense.” Jayede clenched her teeth, feeling her ship become more unstable. She changed the front viewer to a real time perspective, giving her a sense of the planet. It appeared to be habitable, like many of the Free Worlds she visited on a regular basis. As a Guardian, Jayede traveled from Free World, to Free World, archiving many different discoveries that would otherwise be lost to history. She had foolishly asked for a short cut to her next destination, hoping to cut the time she had to travel in space. Despite using dimensional drive, she still had no love of the blackness of space and trips could not end soon enough. “Do we have enough power to get us to the planet?”
“We do, Mistress. I recommend preparing for a crash landing.” As if to reinforce the AI’s point the ship rocked again. Jayede fumbled with the safety harness attached to her seat, and pulled herself in more tightly. The straps snapped against her flight suit, and she gave one more reassuring tug before grasping the controls again. Mentally, there was a silent preparation, as Jayede felt her fear going because of the crash. Crash landings were not as bad as they sounded, with the numerous protections built in to each ship, and each Guardian matched with an AI to provide for the best possible outcome.
“Ready, Able?”
“I am, Mistress. Shield generators are at maximum, with a boost from the dimensional drive power.”
“Take us in. Begin scanning immediately upon breaking atmosphere.” She glanced at the projection of outside, seeing the planet come closer and closer. The rocking of the ship turned to a steady rumble as she steered it in to the upper atmosphere. There was the rising feeling of panic Jayede fought against, even more so than the control yoke. The screen went white for a moment, before flickering back to a view of a verdant forest expanding out towards the horizon. Jayede pulled back on the control yoke, firing the braking thrusters with her left foot as she did so. The trees flashed by in greenish yellow haze.
“Mistress, I have located a clearing, and we have safely exited the upper atmosphere. Engines appear to be fully functional.”
“Bring up the coordinates.” The flashing red arrow lit up the left side of her screen. She eased off the braking and steered in the proper direction. The ship seemed more cooperative now, as the violent shudders ceased and her own panic settled down to a mere queasiness. Jayede breathed a small sigh of relief as the clearing appeared, and she, with the help of Able, brought the small ship down to the ground. It groaned under the impact of the landing, the hull shuddering once more before stillness filled the cabin.
“We are safely on the ground and all atmospheric indicators are safe for your body. I would recommend…” Able’s words were drowned out as Jayede suddenly yanked her harness off, and bolted for the hatch. It opened after her repeated poundings on the release and she collapsed on to the ground, retching and heaving. Once the spasms, past, Jayede settled back, sitting on the edge of the door, wiping her mouth off with her sleeve.
“Sorry, Able. What were you saying?”
“I do not understand, Mistress Jayede, how you can be as well trained as a Guardian accomplished in the zero-point manipulation arts, and yet be unable to cope with space travel? How is it that you are so …”
“If I had an answer, I would give it to you. And I don’t need your teasing either.”
“Perhaps a larger ship with more gravity compensators…?”
“Not necessary, and besides, larger ships do not always mean smoother rides.”
She didn’t mention her preference to being left alone and a fear of crowds as part of her reasons for working alone. The AI personality didn’t need to know everything about her. Instead, she stood up and removed her padded flight suit, feeling the warmth of planet’s sun beginning to warm her fair skin. The black tank top she had underneath was perfect for the temperate climate. Once the suit was off, Jayede tossed it back in to the ship, in the general direction of her bunk.
“Is there is any archival data on this world, Able?” She headed over towards her exterior engine compartment, removing the access panel and poked her head inside. She only had a basic understanding, but the charred connection points between the two components could be considered a bad sign.
“Never mind that info. Check the connection points between the main power and dimensional drive.”
There was a brief moment of silence as Jayede pulled herself out and Able went over the power systems. It was helpful to have the AI do it, but she still felt a little left out. Her thoughts were interrupted as a ship flew overhead. Startled, Jayede ran back to the cockpit trying to see the ship better. It turned slightly before dipping down below the line of evergreen trees beyond the clearing.
“Main power is functional, but the dimensional drive capacitor is blown completely. We will not be able to enter hyperspace without…”
“Yes, yes, I know that. Thank you. Did you detect that ship that just went by?"
“I did, Mistress. Let me review the scans.”
The display in front of her popped back to life and showed an illustration of the passing ship as well as a projection its path and landing point.
“The ship appears to have landed only a few kilometers beyond the clearing. “
“It also looks like a Mekkos landing craft.”
“The data does suggest that, Mistress. It appears that they landed several kilometers outside of the nearest settlement, a large colony that only recently was registered with the Free Worlds.”
“The Mekkos would be interested in this world too, if the colony is new, it might be easy to overthrow. Their mechanical army would meet little resistance.”
“A single shuttle is hardly the sign of an invasion. I would not jump to such conclusions, Mistress. The treaty between the Mekkos and the Free Worlds ceased hostilities.”
“I know that. But, that doesn’t mean they wouldn’t try to attack a world that is barely on the map.” Jayede turned away from the readout and back towards the hatch. Before leaving, she pulled on a supply belt and strapped her sword onto her back, followed by a small rifle. Once equipped, she headed back outside.
“I don’t understand. If we are not engaging in hostilities, what are we going to do?”
“I’ll scout it out and make sure it isn’t what I think it is? And maybe, get some parts to get us off the ground. Don’t transmit a distress until I know for sure.” With that, Jayede began the walk towards the forest.
“And if it is what you think it is? What will you do then?”
“Only what I have to the protect those people.”
