Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Seagal has only directed one film smile  Also, he doesn't even appear in his films any more, it's usually a double. He even has someone else do his ADR for him most of the time big_smile He created a tv show, True Justice, and wrote most of the episodes but watch this clip (it's short) he isn't even in the same room  as his co-stars. If you look closely, his body double is the one who runs past them-

Maybe that's not the best example but it was the shortest clip, I could find and didn't want to inflict too much pain on people. I'll admit, I do enjoy early Seagal films (Out For Justice, Marked For Death etc) and early Van Damme stuff (Bloodsport, Kickboxer, Timecop etc) but never bother with their newer stuff. They just don't have 'it' any more. I agree with Zarban, though, Arnie knew how to pick scripts that suited him best. I would rather watch Commando and Predator than any of SS or JCVD's flicks. Oh, and 'interesting' fact: George Takei appears in an episode of True Justice. big_smile

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

I don't know, I enjoyed "JCVD".

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Yeah, that was good but not a typical Van Damme film, so I didn't include it. If he acted like that in more of his films, Van Damme's rep would be pretty different today.

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

I don't mean to say that all Seagal and all JCVD films are terrible (I posted here recently that I kind of liked Sudden Death), just that those two quickly settled into the same kind of dull crime pulp that Raw Deal is.

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries

Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Oh, I know. And I agree, I was just contributing to the conversation smile

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Don't forget Dolph Lundgren! He directs himself a lot now.

The real reason Seagal's movies all suck is because he has all these rules, and the people making his movies bend to his will for some reason. "I don't bleed, I don't run, I don't get hurt, I don't like guns so we're gonna do lots of hand to hand stuff, we have to have a scene where I sit in a room while incense burns, blah, blah, blah." He's not that big a star, you silly director people! He was in a few above-average action flicks over a couple decades ago. Pretty much everything he's done since then has sucked a camel's ass. Stop letting him dictate things!

Cuba Gooding Jr is making a lot of halfway decent to utter crap action movies lately as well. They mostly go straight to DVD. Some of them are actually not bad at all, like "Linewatch" and "Wrong turn at Tahoe". A lot of them are fucking unwatchable, tho, like "Way of War".

Last edited by Squiggly_P (2012-05-21 03:53:36)

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Can never forget Dolph, the man is awesome. smile

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Zarban wrote:

I just watched Raw Deal for the first time. This was one of the very few holes in my Arnold Schwarzenegger knowledge. It turns out that (surprise!) it's a terrible film, with dull characters and duller dialog, but the structure reminded my strongly of a Steven Seagal film. It's interesting (in a grasping-at-straws way, at least) to think that Schwarzenegger could have gone down the Seagal/Van Damme route, pumping out dull crime shoot-'em-ups year after year.

That movie did bring us the classic "You should not drink and bake."


And speaking of filling Arnold filmography gaps. I watched Jingle all the Way recently for the first time. It's ok I guess, some funny moments and some good lines (put the cookie down!). One thing it does do is prove that Jake Lloyd was an appalling child actor.

Last edited by redxavier (2012-05-21 16:01:37)

Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere. - Carl Sagan

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

redxavier wrote:

That movie did bring us the classic "You should not drink and bake."

And speaking of filling Arnold filmography gaps. I watched Jingle all the Way recently for the first time. It's ok I guess.

Yes! That line stood out. It's especially hilarious the way he just mentions to Darren McGavin at the end "Well, my reunion with my wife went well." WHAT?!

I gave up on Jingle All the Way about half-way thru. Even DVDCommentaries UK couldn't liven it up enough to make it watchable for me.

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries

Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Jingle All The Way is one of the worst films ever made.

Zarban, what do you think of Commando? smile

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Zarban wrote:

I gave up on Jingle All the Way about half-way thru. Even DVDCommentaries UK couldn't liven it up enough to make it watchable for me.

I just heard that DVDCommentaries UK is no more.

Sucks.

Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

I saw The Raid at the cinema today.

I like The Raid.

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

There's a Red Dawn Remake? With (N) Koreans instead of Soviets?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Dawn_%282012_film%29

Protection and power are overrated. I think you are very wise to choose happiness and love. -Uncle Iroh

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Paramount delays 'G.I. Joe: Retaliation' release until 2013...

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/en … 0806.story

... they are converting the movie into 3D.  neutral

Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Huh. Well, maybe if Dorkman works fast enough they can get it in theaters by December.

In other news, the guy who directed Chronicle is going to be directing a film adaptation of Shadow of the Colossus. He's also trying to get a Fantastic Four reboot off the ground and is working on an adaptation of the comic "The Red Star".

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Xtroid wrote:

... they are converting the movie into 3D.  neutral

I hate 3D with a passion.

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

MadBadCoyote wrote:

There's a Red Dawn Remake? With (N) Koreans instead of Soviets?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Dawn_%282012_film%29


Oh, yeah, that's been kicking about for years. It was one of the films that got shelved when MGM went kaput, along with Cabin in the Woods. Both of those films star Chris Hemsworth who probably thought his US career was cursed until he got Thor.

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Squiggly_P wrote:

In other news, the guy who directed Chronicle is going to be directing a film adaptation of Shadow of the Colossus. He's also trying to get a Fantastic Four reboot off the ground and is working on an adaptation of the comic "The Red Star".

Interesting! I liked that comic. I wonder if it would be done in a Sky Captain style in order to keep the budget low?

Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere. - Carl Sagan

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Lamer wrote:
Xtroid wrote:

... they are converting the movie into 3D.  neutral

I hate 3D with a passion.

I don't hate 3D, I just find it every 'meh'. It does nothing for me in the least.

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

On the JCVD/Seagal discussion, I feel obligated to once again tell people to check out Universal Soldier: Regeneration, as an excellent late-career Van Damme flick.

Seagal movies have been terrible for the last 15 years, but at least we got a hilarious/insightful book out of it: http://www.amazon.com/Seagalogy-Ass-Kic … amp;sr=8-1

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

I watched Charlie Chaplin's The Kid (1921) the other day. It was funny and touching, but not what I thought it was going to be. I thought the Little Tramp would meet an orphan kid and have a comical conflict with him and at last befriend him and take him in, and instead it was a straight-up father-son story of sorts.

And there's a fucking weird dream sequence near the end that is just inexplicable.

Oh, and the kid is the cutest kid in the history of the universe. And here he is grown up.

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries

Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Just got back from Snow White & The Huntsman. It's not bad. That's about all you can say about it, really. I like how they gave the queen a bit more of a tragic backstory to her. I like how they kept a lot of the weird fairytale aspects without having it interfere with the story too much via deus ex machina. There are a couple bits that kinda come out of nowhere, but they don't feel wrong or out of place...  more they just pop up and you go "oh wait...  yeah...  this is a fairytale...  huh... I kinda forgot for a minute..."

I do, however, dislike Kristen Stewart's portrayal of Snow White, in that she basically does the same thing Pattinson does in Twilight. I wanted to hand her a bottle of ex-lax and a magazine and say "go take care of that problem, then come back and finish shooting the movie". When she's not pulling a pooping face she does OK, but she does that a lot in this movie.

Also wasn't a big fan of some of the camerawork. Getting really sick of close-up jitter-cam action scenes where just keeping your eyes focused on the point of interest is a chore in itself. I don't think many movies are really planning out how the camera is working to tell the story.

I liked the dwarves, tho, and the movie becomes much more watchable after they show up as they provide the few lighthearted moments in the film. Unfortunately they also aren't really characterized all that well, and it leads to a couple hollow, undeserved moments that are supposed to be emotional but aren't.

I also really liked Theron in the movie. It's not a one-note performance (it's two notes... with a third note every once in a while), and she alternates between chewing the scenery and adding a bit of vulnerability to what is normally the definition of a one dimensional character in most other adaptations. I wish she'd had better motivation in this version, though they do try to rationalize what the typical motivations are. Kinda. It's not entirely successful... at all...

Spoony described it as being similar to the sort of fantasy films you'd see in the 80's like Willow and Ladyhawk, and he's right, but in those movies the fantasy stuff was more involved in the story. Here it's more of a background where the story takes place. The queen and her abilities are the only real fantasy aspect of the film that has bearing on the film. You can remove most of the other bits and not really notice.

There's no Medusa you have to kill in a certain way, there's no curse that needs to be lifted, there's no magic sword that must be found, there's no charmed trinket that bequeaths protection or some special ability. The fantasy aspects are more akin to... i dunno...  more like science, really. Biology. There are creatures. There are plants. They behave in ways that aren't typical of our reality, but in the reality of this world they just ARE a certain way. The queen is the only thing that doesn't really fit, but they magic bean her up, so it's OK. Everything else is just the way things are.

But I liked it overall. Definitely a movie worth picking apart for future study. It's an interesting take on the story that adds some pathos to the queen and thus gives it a bit of a tragic feeling. It's worth watching just for that aspect. There's also a blatantly obvious Princess Mononoke reference in the flick, which will always make me like your movie slightly more.

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Expect more films like it. "Gritty re-imaginings of fairy tales" is the hot genre of the moment.

"The Doctor is Submarining through our brains." --Teague

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

Well they are making at least one new take on the Wizard of Oz. I can't think of any others in production. I'm not against it as a trend. I think westerns are going to be a thing soon with Django and Lone Ranger both set to make lots of money. If you were to start production right now on a gritty western sci-fi/fantasy film, you'd probably make a lot of money OHSHITSOMEONEMAKEDARKTOWERRIGHTNOW!

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Re: Random Movie Talk That Probably Doesn't Deserve Its Own Thread

I heard the reviews for Snow White and the Huntsman were pretty bad, but the trailer makes it look like a lot of fun. I'm sure I'll catch it on video.

I just watched Howl's Moving Castle, the first anime I've watched in quite a while. I didn't care for Princess Mononoke, but I loved this. It was a lot of fun, altho there was a lack of setting up of the rules of the world that I wish was handled better. It would make a terrific big-budget, live-action film, I think.

Last edited by Zarban (2012-06-02 23:31:46)

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries