Topic: Star Wars- Jar Jar

I'm a Star Wars fan. I love Star Wars more than most and I want to love the prequels like I do the originals. Because of this wanting to love what is unlovable I have come to realize something in my mind, and I hope to be able to explain it here. Now let me set this up. What is the worst thing about all the Star Wars movies plot wise. Undeniably it is Jar Jar Binks. But unfotunatly he is needed to further the plot of the movies, however, he is not there to further the plot in a good way. I have come to realize, Jar Jar is the Dark Lord of the Sith. Not Palpatine, he is just a pawn. Here's how I realized this. In most movies if there is a character in a movie that if they died the whole conflict would be solved, that character is usually the main villian, or in league with main villian. Jar Jar in the movies is supposed to be a good guy, but he does nothing good. In fact if Qui-Gon had let him die, the Galaxy would of been saved.

Lets go through this point by point. Jar Jar is the one who takes the Obi-Wan and Qui-gon to the Gungan city. So if he had not gotten them transport to Theed, the queen would of been forced to sign a treaty that although is never fully explained can only be guessed that offered a portion of all revenue from trade to the trade federation. Naboo would be hurt economically a bit, but it would not be crippling because there is no way they could take all revenue without the rest of the galaxy raising an eyebrow. THus saving alot of people who where killed by the Federation occupation and sending the Jedi to do some more important things. But considering they are more common than crickets, we can only assume the more important thing would be help some poor sod who lost his home due to foreclosure.

Now that the first movie ended with alot of people not dead, the galaxy is already much better off, but it is also very possible that systems never began leaving the republic because the trade dispute was solved thus no reason for the  Trade Federation to secede and bring others with them, thus the Galaxy would never be plunged into the Clone Wars, thus no need to give the chancellor any extra powers thus Palpatine would have been forced to leave office after his term, and thus the Jedi would never be destroyed, Anakin would still be a whiny baby, but thats another note. and thus the galaxy is much better off. (And yes I like to say "Thus.")

Now you may be wondering "How does that make Jar Jar the Dark lord?" Well look at the first movie. THere are many times where he should of been killed but by "Luck" WHich doesn't exist, I might add. He goes through an entire battle, being pretty much dead center of most the action, and he isn't even targetted by the droids, which are seen in several scenes to be surrounding him. Yet not targetted, not even scratched? He even fell from the back of a crago truckish thing, and by some miracle isn't crushed by the door, or the huge, blue ball things, I forget what they are called. Then he gets flung onto a tank turret by an explosion, how did that not kill him? Now don't ask me why the droid doesn't just pop out and shoot him right there, but it waits for the perfect moment for Jar Jar not only to be juggling one of those blue balls, but the exact moment when Jar Jar has lost it going perfectly toward where the droid is popping up. Thats very lucky in a world with no luck.

Thats not the end of the "should be dead" moments. In episode 2 he is a Representative of Naboo. Note the senator at the time has a price on her head. Most plots don't just kill the number 1 guy, most plots (or good plots anyway) Take care of the Number 1 guy, the number 2 guy and the number 3 guy. Jar Jar would be well within the "WHo to kill" list but he is never seen in any danger. Also according to the lore of Star Wars there are several attacks made by people against the creation of an army. Jar Jar is the one who proposed  the emergency powers, so in a way, he is responsible for the creation of an army and he never even has an attempt made on him? For having no connection to the force he has gotten very lucky throughout the first movies. We know luck doesn't exist meaning he had to be using the force to ensure his survival, as well as manipulating the rest of the galaxy into such a perfect way to ensure the Sith domination over everything.

What do you all think? Am I in the ballpark, or a raving lunatic?

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

I'm afraid I'll have to go raving lunatic.  Although I admire your dedication, and if this was true would make the prequels a hell of a lot more interesting, unfortunatly I believe it came down to the fact that Lucas wanted to shove in a Cee-Threepio, trying to make a cult, child friendly character, and failed miserably.

Last edited by MonsieurVelo (2012-01-22 23:10:55)

Too much garbage in your face?  There's plenty of space in space!

Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

I don't think even the aimed audience - children - liked him.

Sébastien Fraud
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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

Robot Chicken already mentioned that possibility smile

I write stories! With words!
http://www.asstr.org/~Invid_Fan/

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

I don't think Jar-Jar's luck has as much to do with luck as it does Lucas' writing whatever he feels like writing. The Queen keeps guns in the little drink holder in her throne. It was sure lucky they remembered to put guns in there, considering that it doesn't seem like they would ever need anything like that. In reality, they just needed guns to pop up from somewhere in that scene, so that's where Lucas put them. Something like that you can get away with if you take the time to set it up before hand. Have the queen about to pull the guns when she first gets captured and have captain McOne-Eye give her a subtle head shake, as if to say "bitch, don't pull those fucking guns outta that throne!" Then when you get to the later scene, she pulls the guns and the audience goes "OH YEAH!! THEY WERE THERE BEFORE!" and there's a sense of realization and satisfaction to that, even if it's still really stupid to have those guns there. It doesn't feel as stupid and contrived anymore if you set it up really early like that.

But, honestly, Jar-Jar is probably the most well-written character in the first movie. He's got a clear arc, from bumbling idiot outcast to bumbling idiot military leader. He's got personality. it's an annoying personality, but it's a personality. I kinda feel sorry for him. He just gets used a lot in the movie. The Jedi meet up with him and he's all "I don't wanna go home, guys, they'll fucking kill me" and the jedi badger him into going so he takes them. Then the Jedi come this close to just leaving him there. He has to beg them to help him. What assholes. Then they leave and they treat him like shit up until they get back to Naboo, and then they're like "OK, we need you to distract the robots, so you and the other gungans go on this suicide mission to get wiped out and if we can pull off this thousand-to-one shot over here then maybe you won't die."

Honestly, tho, the thing in that movie that bothers me the most is the bomb in the kid's head. There's a fucking bomb in his head. When did they take that out of there? There's no "extracting the bomb from the kid's head" scene, and they don't bring it up after they leave the planet, so...  Is it still there? Did they take it out on the way to Corescant or however it's spelled? You think they woulda at least stuck a shot in there where someone says "while we're flying to this other planet, we'll have time to take the bomb out of your head", or get to the planet and tell some doctor there to remove it.

Cause it's a bomb, and it's in his head.

Last edited by Squiggly_P (2012-01-23 02:18:34)

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

"Uh, George?"

"Yeah?"

"Listen, I don't know if I forgot or something, but is there a scene where they take the bomb out of his head?"

"The what?"

"The bomb. Anakin said that there's a bomb in his head. That will blow up when he leaves."

"So?"

"Did you want to, uh...like...do a scene about that?"

"Nah, it'll be fine."

"But I really think that-"

"YOU'RE FIRED. GET YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE NOW."

"The Doctor is Submarining through our brains." --Teague

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v611/Squiggly_P/Yoda-senses-fear.png

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

"Bombs lead to anger! Anger leads to hate! Hate leads to...more bombs!"

"The Doctor is Submarining through our brains." --Teague

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

Let me reiterate that. I believe that is the truth, but everyone seems to agree that it was George's poor writing. Let me ask, is it possible that Jar Jar could be the Sith Lord? I have already listed how many times that Jar Jar should be dead, is it a possibility that George Lucas unintentionallyput in a story that made it possible that the most annoying character ever made, was also the most evil?

As for the bomb in Anakin's head, I always assumed it wasn't a bomb it just made his blood mostly jet fuel, and thats why he lit up like a match at the end of Episode 3.


As for the Robot Chicken, when I saw that I went insane because that made me realize that I wasn't the only one with this train of thought.

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Occam's_razor

When taking all the evidence into account, I find it more likely that George is an incompetent writer than that he is secretly a genius. If he was that good, the prequels would have been well written.

Last edited by Doctor Submarine (2012-01-23 14:28:42)

"The Doctor is Submarining through our brains." --Teague

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Re: Star Wars- Jar Jar

We agree on that point. I am simply saying that out of stupidity he missed how it could be seen as Jar Jar as pure evil. In the end I respect your opinions but like I said I don't know if I will ever be able to get over the dissappointment, but everyone has their own reactions.

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