Topic: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Some of you already know about an article I recently wrote (and didn't publicize, heh) about an experience I had on Reddit. Without giving too much away, it was fucking nuts.

Anyway, just for funsies and because I have the equipment, I've put together an "audiobook" sort of version of it, because I had always wanted to try such a thing.

Unabridged, about forty minutes long.

Enjoy.

Teague Chrystie

I have a tendency to fix your typos.

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Narrate my life, please.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

I was an e-observer - though not a direct participant - in this saga as it unfolded in real time. It prompted me to check out both Reddit and 4chan for the first time.   As a result, I came to understand Reddit's hatred of 4chan as well as 4chan's hatred of Reddit. And I agree with both.   

I will say that 4chan easily outdoes Reddit as far as posting jpgs of dismembered prostitutes. I never did figure out what Reddit was good at.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Thanks for sharing.

Did you ever curate the links and articles written about the "incident"?

http://cdn0.meme.li/instances/300x300/39111338.jpg

Last edited by AshDigital (2013-06-25 14:38:24)

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I would never lie. I willfully participate in a campaign of misinformation.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Damn. I feel so fucking bad for you, man. That said, great essay, and a well-performed audiobook. You should do this kinda thing more often.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

I really liked this. Fascinating and extremely well read. I'm so sorry to hear you went through this, even though your recounting of your experience was very entertaining.

Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere. - Carl Sagan

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Wow, thanks guys.  smile

Teague Chrystie

I have a tendency to fix your typos.

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Downloading this to listen on a bus journey I am partaking in tomorrow! smile

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My goodness Teague, I'm sorry this happened to you. I wanna give you a hug now.
(Not that I didn't want to before, just more so now)

I also thought you had a nice reading voice. (Showed this to a couple friends, and they all said that you were funny and that they enjoyed listening to it. So... yay ^_^)

Teague wrote:

29:28 "..I can now easily navigate 4chan."

I still have absolutely no idea how anyone does this. I mainly get confused and have mean things said to me when I go on there.

Protection and power are overrated. I think you are very wise to choose happiness and love. -Uncle Iroh

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

It's the sort of thing that doesn't make sense until it does. Like innuendo. Or gin.

Teague Chrystie

I have a tendency to fix your typos.

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Teague, that narrative was downright fascinating.

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

I've been meaning to ask: where are things at now? Has all interest in you died off or are you still getting harassed?

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Mostly died down, now.

Teague Chrystie

I have a tendency to fix your typos.

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Trey wrote:

I will say that 4chan easily outdoes Reddit as far as posting jpgs of dismembered prostitutes. I never did figure out what Reddit was good at.

Agreed, 4chan is much better for pure chaos but /b/ moves way too fast to actually follow. If you really wanna see the craziest shit the place has to offer, check out /r9k/ and /pol/. They never fail to entertain me when I'm bored. For fuck sake, I saw an infographic on /pol/ the other day about WHO CONTROLS YOUR MIND and it was a list of media executives they all claimed to be part of a Jewish Illuminati Lizard conspiracy, with George Lucas listed among those responsible.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

You could read /pol/. Or you could just smash your head through a couple windows. Same basic effect.

"The Doctor is Submarining through our brains." --Teague

Twitter | Tumblr, for links to all my writing.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Any board that is able to tap into Alex Jones' subconscious and harness it like they do is incredible. It's utter shit, but it's incredible.

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Ewing wrote:

If you really wanna see the craziest shit the place has to offer, check out /r9k/ and /pol/. They never fail to entertain me when I'm bored.

I only trolled the fetid waters of /b/ during the Trials of Teague, just helping keep watch for any new attacks they might have come up with. 

It was quite something -  it was pure, uncut Internet. It was the internet politicians think is everywhere but is actually pretty rare unless you really really look for it.   Or trip and fall into it, like I did.   It was an internet I'd never seen before, in thirty-some years of using the internet.   It was like Hannibal Lecter's Tumblr.  It was John Doe's TED talk.  It was a wormhole journey to Vega and I was a tiny Jodie Foster, trembling at its enormity.   

In the space of one evening trolling /b/  I saw maybe a dozen of the most horrifying images I've EVER seen (and I've been to Hong Kong).   One of them was also THE FUNNIEST lolcat-style meme I have ever seen - because the image was so horrific.  I would never ever post that image anywhere - I might try describing it to somebody, maybe - and yet it was for me, the ultimate use of the lolcat meme format, so breathtakingly awful and thus hideously funny,  that the entire lolcat thing should probably just be retired entirely.  It has been won.

I don't know if I will ever look at 4chan again.  But I have seen it.  And for me, the world is forever changed.

Reddit meanwhile was a lot of tiny text.  I didn't stick around.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Firstly, your summary is breathtaking. I want it on chiseled in marble and placed in front of Congress the next time they discuss the internet.

Secondly, please describe this perverted deviant image.

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Not only was this amongst the best 40 minutes of audiobookery there is, my playlist started "Holy Diver" by Killswitch Engange(cover version, I know) right after it. Worked well.

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Tomahawk wrote:

Not only was this amongst the best 40 minutes of audiobookery there is, my playlist started "Holy Diver" by Killswitch Engange(cover version, I know) right after it. Worked well.

That's a fun cover, and, wow, the song does kind of go well with the story—all that hellish imagery is reminiscent of the Internet's scariest depths.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NR7dG_m3MsI

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

man that was good.  i had a bunch of stuff i should have been doing just now, but no...Teague and his story of the little post that did totally sucked me in.

great story, glad everything turned out alright.

(and damn i wish he'd recorded that alarm soundbite)

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Discover the depths of the Internet:
http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/31670205.jpg

God loves you!

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

fireproof78 wrote:

Discover the depths of the Internet:
http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/31670205.jpg

Then I would correct your grammar.

Warning: I'm probably rewriting this post as you read it.

Zarban's House of Commentaries

Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

Yeah, probably should have checked the spelling before linking

http://iruntheinternet.com/lulzdump/images/gifs/naked-gun-face-palm-head-slap-doh-1360196138K.gif

Last edited by fireproof78 (2013-07-03 04:37:15)

God loves you!

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Re: Reading: The Internet Knows Where I Live

This just played on my iTunes, and because I am a very shameless person

1. I listened to it
2. I was proud of it
3. I am now bumping this thread in case some folks missed it

Teague Chrystie

I have a tendency to fix your typos.

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