Attack the Block did not get any press in the US. It's been word-of-mouth, like District 9. I'll definitely have to catch up with it.

I rewatched Waking Ned Devine yesterday, which I loved just as much this time as I did the first. My 9-y-o nephew watched the last hour of it and liked it a lot. For me, this stands with Local Hero and (to a slightly lesser degree) The Englishman Who Went up a Hill But Came Down a Mountain as simply adorable British film making.

Then my 9-y-o niece arrived, and the three of us watched Big Trouble in Little China. It was awesome, altho the monster was scary but you could kind of tell that it was fake.

Ninotchka was a real disappointment. I remember liking Greta Garbo in other stuff in my college film class, but this comedy of manners didn't work for me at all. She's a humorless Soviet diplomat romanced by Melvyn Douglas as a slick, unscrupulous sort—the missed remake should have starred Jodie Foster and George Clooney. It's considered a major classic, but all the humor falls flat, and Douglas seems old and unlikeable. I gave up after 20 minutes, not long after she falls for him and learns to laugh—because I didn't.

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(473 replies, posted in Episodes)

http://www.zarban.com/pics/panicking.jpg

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(5 replies, posted in Off Topic)

New York Times wrote:

LOS ANGELES — On Feb. 24 Hollywood will turn out for the Oscars. But it’s starting to feel as if it might be “The Last Picture Show.”

If you're saying a young Cybill Shepherd will take her top off, I might watch this year.

/you're probably not saying that

Okay, having grown up in the 1970s, I was too old for whole Power Rangers thing. So my question is this: are you people serious? Honestly, that show was a ridiculously lame repackaging of a Japanese TV show, with rubber monster suits and terrible acting. Is this stuff for real? Because I'd really like for everyone to stop.

My generation doesn't act like Sigmund and the Sea Monsters and Hong Kong Phooey need gritty, action-packed reboots.

Now, Jonny Quest.... there's a property that needs a $200 million live action movie.....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0kg_tzQvf4

I decided to sit down with The Evil Dead last night for the first time and enjoyed the hell out of it. The first part has some nice atmosphere and skillful suspense building. In the second half, Bruce Campbell does a good job keeping the insanity grounded. I expected to see the beginning of his trademark swagger, but he's really quite normal.

It's considerably more low-budget than I was expecting. Many of the effects are so bad they can't be taken seriously. There's some amateurish editing at times and wobbly acting (but not as wobbly as Night of the Living Dead '68), and it's a bit hard to keep the girls straight. But overall, it's a lot of ridiculous fun.

Lamer wrote:

https://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/12/10/24/aACarqF8j0ycoUzoPbZiAQ2.png

http://www.zarban.com/pics/duel-in-drag.jpg

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(431 replies, posted in Off Topic)

At last! A Cajun Klingon lawyer! I've been saying we need one of those for ages, but Teague never listened....

Welcome!

Say no more! Say no more! I'm all arseholes and elbows! Flibber me gibbet, gov'nor!

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(25 replies, posted in Episodes)

bullet3 wrote:

That discussion about an earthquake hitting during a DIF commentary is making me imagine a found-footage horror film starring the DIF crew trying to survive a disaster in LA, and then desperately wanting such a movie to exist.

An earthquake in LA? What would make it horror? The traffic?

oh. right. after a few hours, they would eat trey.

I just watched these back-to-back, altho I'd seen Johnny English in the theater in 2003.

The two films star Rowan Atkinson as Johnny English, secret agent for MI-7, but not exactly the best. In the first film, he starts out at a desk job, providing dossiers to the "real" field agents. But when those top agents get blown up, only Agent English and his sidekick are left to track down the perpetrators.

Sound familiar? It got reused in 2008 for Get Smart. Don't feel bad for the writers, tho—Neil Purvis, Robert Wade, and William Davies. Davies, along with Hamish McColl, stole the rest of Get Smart for Johnny English Reborn.

Not that anybody should really be proud, of course. All spy spoofs by definition borrow heavily from the James Bond films—right down to the Aston Martins. Speaking of which, both films were made for a pittance compared to a Bond film and yet look fantastic.

In JE, English must protect the British crown jewels and, when they are inevitably stolen from out from under his nose, retrieve them from a crazy Frenchman played by John Malkovich. Australian soap star/singer Natalie Imbruglia is the beauty, and English has a rather superfluous sidekick named Bough ("Boff") and the typical fuming boss.

It has some very good action set pieces, including a chase with English's Aston Martin hanging off the crane of a flat bed tow truck. And the dialog is fairly sharp and effective. Imbruglia's banter in particular is precise and sexy, but she gets very little to do as the film goes on; she should have replaced Bough entirely. Most of the humor is either slapstick or humiliation, but most of it works. A somewhat flat ending featuring Malkovich ranting in his ridiculous accent (I mean different from the ridiculous way he usually talks) is raised by Imbruglia and the reprise of a spectacular theme tune delivered by Robbie Williams.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbuN-00C468

In JER, English is recalled after five years in disgrace after a failed mission in Mozambique. He is the only agent that an ex-CIA agent will talk to about a plot to assassinate the Chinese Prime Minister. English rejoins British Intelligence (now known as Toshiba British Intelligence), and goes to work for a new boss played by Gillian Anderson (looking radiant). However, the beauty here is supposed to be Rosamund Pike as a staff psychologist. Her introduction is fairly awkward, coming rather casually in an office in the middle of Anderson's scene.

English is given another superfluous sidekick—Tucker, who is at least more interesting than Bough was, but again should have been replaced by the girl. Dominic West is Agent Simon Ambrose, who introduces us to Atkinson's old Blackadder buddy Tim MacInerny as a disabled version of Q. It's a natural gadget scene that was missing from the first film and works very well here—we are later told to suspect a mole in Toshiba British Intelligence and here we've met five suspects at the beginning of the film.

Richard Schiff is the ex-CIA man who explains that a mysterious group of three assassins called "Vortex" is behind the assassination plot. After a rather funny parody of Casino Royale's parkour chase, English is humiliated. Rosamund Pike helps English recall a suppressed memory: Vortex was behind his failure years before in Mozambique. This clue leads to the second member of the organization, which also ends badly because of an Asian assassin.

If it seems odd that a trio of assassins would hire another assassin to assassinate each other in spite of their reputed collusion in another assassination, you've struck upon the film's secondary problem: its lack of a defined and theatrical villain. The primary one is that the dialog isn't as sharp, and the humiliation and slapstick humor falls flat a little more often than in the first film. An elaborate chase scene with a motorized wheelchair, for example, is neither as funny or as exciting as it was meant to be.

However, once English and Tucker get to Switzerland to stop the assassination, things do pick up. Tucker gets something to do. Atkinson gets a funny fight with himself that's even better than the one in the first film. And Pike brings home an effective bit of drama that, combined with a nice action sequence, makes for a solid climax. Robbie Williams' "A Man for All Seasons" theme is sadly missing, but the credits sequence where English makes dinner is fun.

Overall, both films are most effective for fans of Atkinson and James Bond. I'm both and still feel that the second film in particular is a bit familiar and clumsy. The poor integration of the female leads in both is a big mistake that Get Smart and the first Austin Power movie didn't make and which gave them more heart.

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(5 replies, posted in Episodes)

I think we're clear for Seven 2: Fourteen: Even Sevener. There's no way Mills goes to prison under the circumstances. He gets off with temporary insanity and undergoes court-mandated therapy and 5 years' probation and eventually gets rehired to the force with a desk job in the Evidence room.

The real crime, of course, is the fact that Somerset makes no physical attempt to stop Mills. For that, he loses his job and becomes a hotel concierge, where he eventually meets an aging socialite and travels the world solving crimes in high society as private detective.

Jon Doe (note the spelling on the leather shop receipt), actually recovers from his wounds and ends up a zombified husk in the "brown level" of a state mental asylum.

The Final Destination movies are good examples. Some people avoid death... and then they don't. The only reason to watch the films is to witness the spectacle of how exactly that happens.

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(64 replies, posted in Off Topic)

That's weird. When I was a kid, I watched a show that was also called Battlestar Galactica. It was about a ragtag force of rebels fleeing heartless killer robots in space.

Clearly, this show is about a big-titted chick who likes red dresses and emulating Jesus from classical paintings.

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(991 replies, posted in Off Topic)

To be fair, that T-shirt slogan kind of got away from him.

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(7 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Would we change the Germans to aliens? Or just have the US military storming the beach at Anzio in mechs?

Also, Operation Dumbo Drop is going to seem extra weird.

You know what would work perfectly tho? Bat 21. Gene Hackman gets shot down behind enemy lines, avoids enemies, and uses golf courses as a location code for a rescue.

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(29 replies, posted in Episodes)

Altho I like Resident Evil, everything Anderson has done feels mushy and incomplete. Event Horizon comes close to feeling fully realized, but I really don't like the whole Hellraiser-on-the-Nostromo premise. I don't find it interesting or scary.

I watched Jackie Chan's First Strike the other day with my 9-y-o nephew. Neither of us had ever seen it, and we enjoyed the hell out of it. Next up: Operation Condor, which I saw in the theater.

There's something about Jackie Chan movies that keeps me from loving them, but I do always really enjoy them.

And today I saw Hotel Transylvania in the theater with my sister and 9-y-o niece. We liked it well enough, but I thought it wasn't really as funny as I'd hoped, and my niece thought it wasn't all that funny and had too much romance. ("Kids don't like that stuff!") The 3D was great (the first polarized 3D film I've seen, actually).

It was kind of weirdly focused on Adam Sandler's obsessive Dracula and his attempts to keep his daughter from wanting to travel. You would THINK that Andy Samberg's human Jonny would stumble upon the hotel for monsters, fall for the vampire girl, and try to avoid suspicion by pretending to be a monster, but it's actually Dracula who tries to keep everyone else from discovering that there is a terrifying human in their midst. Odd choice. Selena Gomez as the vampire daughter Mavis was terrific but Jonny is a clueless dork; no way that relationship lasts.

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(30 replies, posted in Episodes)

I haven't seen this movie, but every time I see a new comment in this thread, it reminds me that I need to work on my idea to open a space-themed Mexican chicken restaurant called El Pollo 11

The menu would include "pollo de luna", "spam in a can", "the chicken has landed", and a family-style platter called "one giant heap for all mankind".

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(23 replies, posted in Episodes)

Trey wrote:

So instead of the classic Faust tragedy - don't make a deal with the Devil, because he always wins in the end - we got a rather muddled movie story of a nice guy who becomes a multiple murderer... and gets away with it.   Now THAT'S dark.  smile

I like the movie's choice. The original ending would be fun to see, but I doubt I'd prefer it.

In Marlowe's Dr. Faustus, the devil takes the doctor. But in Goethe's Faust and every other later version I can think of (The Devil and Daniel Webster; Bedazzled; Oh God, You Devil, etc.), the devil is beaten. Beating the devil is just more interesting because the protagonist is at such an obvious disadvantage.

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(1,649 replies, posted in Off Topic)

dj_bakerman wrote:

JJ Abrams's three-frame clip from Star Trek Into Darkness

I won't say it's better than the first film, but it does make more sense.

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(23 replies, posted in Off Topic)

What a coincidence that 1920s technology and film making economics somehow chose the perfect frame rate to be visually realistic but not too realistic when all they were trying for was a standard minimum rate for good optical sound....

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(569 replies, posted in Creations)

I like to think there's a little Vanilla Ice in all of us...

http://foodandwinehedonist.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/vanilla-ice-flag-suit-mamapopcom.jpg

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(91 replies, posted in Off Topic)

Haven't seen this yet, but Rian Johnson has made a commentary available already.

http://www.zarban.com/?p=29870

Most of the dumb names and the journey to Celestial City come right from Pilgrim's Progress, a kind of Christianity for Dummies allegory.

I'll bet the movie was a blast to make. Plus, now everyone has an IMDb credit!

The Pirates! Band of Misfits (UK title: The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists, based on a book) is a 2012 Aardman stop-mo film but not a Nick Park film. It's all about a nameless pirate captain trying to win Pirate of the Year with his crew of also nameless pirates. He's a kindly captain but a terrible pirate, but not because he won't kill people; he seems quite ready to pillage and murder. Then we are supposed to be concerned when people want to steal his pet dodo for science. If this sounds kind of dumb, unfortunately it is.

I can't stress this point enough: none of the main characters have names except Charles Darwin. On numerous occasions, the hero signs his name, is introduced to crowds, put on wanted posters, given awards, declared an outlaw, etc. where he must just be called 'the Pirate Captain' despite the presence of other pirate captains. He doesn't even make up a name when he's in disguise. He just calls himself 'the Scientist Captain.' And his crewmen have to be called things like 'the Pirate with a Scarf' and 'Suspiciously Curvaceous Pirate'. It's a very dumb non-joke.

The movie looks fantastic, with terrific stop-mo enhanced with terrific CG. If you like that sort of thing, you will love this particular thing. The setting takes place in a strange version of 1837 when cutlass-wielding pirates still roam the high seas, but steamships, photography, and electricity also exist—altho this fact isn't revealed for about 40 minutes. And the Pirate King dresses like Elvis for some reason.

Hugh Grant, Martin Freeman, and David Tennant do well as the principles; and there's some fun music. There are some gags and jokes here and there that work, and my 9-y-o niece and nephew liked it quite a bit, but not as much as Princess Bride or Willow, altho it compared pretty well to Curse of the Were Rabbit. Overall, I found it to be perfectly pleasant but a bit dull, certainly lacking the spark of Wallace and Gromit.